oh dear, my mascara is staining my eyes..
i was anxious about tday, and treated it like it was the ULTIMATE real thing
so i thought about looking more..presentable.
and hence the eye applications.
make-up is soo troublesome [ even if it was just a little dab, here and there ].
today was.. okayy.
it wasn’t entirely nerve-wrecking. turns out that there’s still some stuff to be done.
i need to do jst 1 more thing for that. [but that’s okay, i think].
but now i have to rethink my proposal.
rethinking FYP proposal = more literature review = more reading.
more reading [for FYP proposal] + reading [for exam] = more workload.
more workload = more pressure.
more pressure = breakdown (?)
that could be. possible.
there’s this unconveyed message that i feel frm your manner of speaking.
do i look that bad?
like i am so weak and vulnerable and flawed and incapable.
like this is so unbefitting of me.
like i am so undeserving. of something good.
i may not have read every single book ever written, or went through every single experience of learning, or aced every single challenge unscathed, but really, do i really give-off that dim vibe?
cause if i do then i wonder.
what am i ever capable of, in your eyes (?)