i remember this place.
my friends discovered it first back then, and told me about this place which they think i would like.
so i came and saw it myself, and then i don’t quite know why i keep coming back.
it became sort of a little corner where i sometimes run to when i don’t wanna be with people.
like that one time when i got into a little bit of a rough patch (the unsalvaged war) with someone in campus
so i immediately left (before class even ended. bcause i really thought it was the end of that class) and spent the early evening in this place, pick a couple of books and trying to calm down.
maybe i just have this need to be alone whenever my mood is off
especially when i’m upset or angry
i run away and hide sometimes.
because i try to not deal with people when i’m emotionally unstable.
and this is a place where no one is around almost all the time (the only one who’s always there was the owner, and he usually doesn’t mind you hanging around there for as long as you wish).
so yes. for that short period of time in that small little place, that was my temporary shelter. my little refuge.
but then we moved to the new campus and i had to lose my little refuge.
everything feels different and crowded and congested
there are people everywhere, you’re surrounded but you’re really just on your own
you are alone in a sea of human beings
you walk the same path but your destinations are too far apart
you’ll always walk alone
and somewhere along the way i’m guessing i found comfort in that little space of shelter back then because it was what someone else found while thinking of me
of what i would like
of where i would want to be.
so it doesn’t feel like just another reading place
not to me
i came back there when i was doing my final year project
and it’s still the same as how i had left it
the same feeling.
perhaps underneath all the superficial nature of every single day
some things do remain as they are
but what a pity that only some little things do
i can’t be like that little reading place
i can’t stay when everyone is leaving.
i can’t become the constant in someone else’ everchanging life.
even if it means i’ll keep running away all my life i just can’t be someone that i’m not.
but that little place will always have a reserved spot in my heart.
S K O O B
Old Town PJ Section 3