today is the first of july, the day that lady diana was born.
yesterday was the day that i finally get things completed and done.
after tomorrow the long wait for a possibly life-changing verdict begins.
i feel relieved, albeit a little worried.
no one would really understand why i do, if i don’t really want it that badly.
you don’t have to really want to arrive somewhere before you actually arrive somewhere.
you don’t have to really want to be twenty-three before you actually turn twenty-three.
it doesn’t really matter whether you want to or not, you just are and things just happen and you just go along with it like it’s meant to be if it ever is meant to be.
i don’t really want it that badly, but if it were to happen i want it to be as good as it can be.
of course what i want doesn’t really change anything, but if it helps to make things better then why wouldn’t i try and feel like i’ve done everything within my power to make it better?
our fate has been written but we still have some sort of hand over our own destiny before it is finally revealed what fate has in store for us
so for now
i choose to make the most out of whatever that i have left for now
this is my journey now
i want to decide on my own.