randomadness(?)

Published July 16, 2010 by crystalights

 

dear crystalight hearts,

`

although you weren’t exactly my most beloved blog, and i’m almost a week late, i still felt like i should be a good pagemaster and congratulate your belated 1 year anniversary.

`

i created you a day after my 22nd birthday, and now that i turned 23 last week i guess i should appreciate you more.

`

you were there to take in all my rants and spazzes and tantrums when no one else was. (well, sorta).

`

anyway.

`

i’m usually sad, stressed, hurt or angry when i’m here. and i guess that was why i didn’t like you very much. because you remind me of all that dark feelings whenever i’m here.

`

i always told myself that once i finished my attachment and my studies i’m gonna put you on an indefinite hiatus or something.

but

i don’t know why even after all that i keep coming back to write. even my diary isn’t receiving the same kind of treatment, let alone my other friend-based blogs.

`

but i think i know now.

`

it’s the idea of anonymity whenever i’m here-

of writing without identification.

yeah.

i like that a lot.

so that only what is written is scrutinized, instead of who is writing it.

`

i think i kinda understood why J.K rowling wanted to use a different name and write a different story after harry potter was done.

it’s like starting anew, without your past as an extra baggage.

as a potter reader it would be a nice challenge to find that new story and somehow knowing that it is her work after all. her writing.

and that is what i call an exceptional reader.

`

so crystalight hearts,

i felt that i always hold myself back frm writing to you because i don’t feel like it’s normal to write so much within a span of a very short time.

i can’t just write all the time-

it’s not normal.

i want to feel like i’m normal.

but it left me feeling unsatisfied (because most of the time human beings can’t be what i need them to be –

they can’t take in too much information)

i don’t blame them though.

but i don’t intend to torture them any time soon any longer

so

i think i’ll just keep on writing to you (even though it makes me feel a bit abnormal).

`

sincerely,

-your pagemaster-

P/S: happy one year anniversary!

P.P/S: my parents are going away for the weekend so i’m in charge of the kids for the next two days!

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