speaking thoughts into words

Published October 13, 2010 by crystalights

 

most of the time

when i talk to my mum,

i’m always right.

when i talk to my lil’ brothers,

i’m always right.

but when i talk to my lil’ sister,

i’m always wrong.

it’s not particularly disturbing for me (because i can live with people thinking that i’m wrong as long as i’m not really wrong), but sometimes i have these afterthoughts about how i should sharpen up my argumentative skills.

.

with my mum it doesn’t take much from me to convince her of my personal thoughts and opinions.

my lil’ brothers kinda just follow whatever i say as if i knew everything.

but on the other hand with my lil’ sister, the effect is quite the opposite.

it’s like every little thing is a test where i have to pass before she decides whether or not my words are believable.

because she somehow thinks that i am this sly, pessimistic, difficult and cynically suspecting person.

so if i say something is wrong with someone or something, she would probably say things like : “but you always say that about other people” or “but you always feel something’s wrong all the time”

and then i usually counter it by building up my case as effectively convincing as i can.

but now that i’ve been away from the outside world for so long i think i might have lost my touch

maybe i’m losing my word wit and my communicating capabilities

i don’t wanna believe it

because i believe that a few months of seclusion shouldn’t have altered anything that i already have.

i should be able to smoothly converse, right?  

.

when i write i have time to collect my thoughts and carefully arrange them into words.

when i talk i don’t always have the time to do the same.

so i guess i don’t really talk that well when i’m put on a time restraint.

and that problem gets bigger when i’m dealing with a quick-witted fast talker.

like my lil’ sister.

.

it has to be convincing enough within that short period of time before she hangs up the phone.

.

but

yesterday, 

i don’t think it was.

.

am i finally losing it?

i don’t quite know.

.

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