what do you call this feeling?
bile tibe2 kiter kembali ke mana kiter pnah tinggalkn stlh skian lama berkelana.
after all that time suddenly
i find myself on my bed in our shared bedroom
texting my friends and rplying mssages
as if i’ve always been here and the past few months (up to a year) nver really happened (before).
i don’t intend to erase anything
before and after, are both parts of my life now.
but i didn’t think that i would still have
some of the things that i left behind.
the room bsically still looks the same
and although earlier tday i think i didn’t know where mom put some of her pots n pans,
and her asam jawa (in the kitchen),
finally when i start doing and thinking (abt) things in this home
i feel like: hey,
at least i get to be here now.
the days before i left were probably the loneliest,
i guess it’s the kind of feeling when you’re surrounded but alone.
reflecting on the last few views of the city,
i don’t know where life would take me sooner or later,
amidst the job-hunting, and license arranging,
and accounts setting,
i’m here now.
it is a blessing that all is not completely lost.
my past and my future,
is all up to god’s mercy and will,
i thought it’s normal for people to leave
since some of them stayed aftr all
i guess i have to know
that this has got to be worth something
life will pass us by
no soul can stop time
seasons replace one another
that’s what they do,
they don’t stay.
but i guess when they leave, they do come back.
that is if you’re still there to see it.
as for me,
i want to embrace. time.
i want to be thankful.
i want to be at peace with time.