the last entry of the year.

Published December 31, 2011 by crystalights


mgkn kblkngn ni agak carried away with travelling, and cleaning and tidying and contacting people and planning and settling in and some other things,

smpai hmpir2 terlupe that the new year is just around the corner. 

and it’s like a rather near “corner” if i might add, in fact it’s coming in the nxt few hours (insyaAllah).


a lot of bittersweet things happened throughout this year.

i think the fact that i finally got home in one piece before the year ended was a big mercy itself, alhamdulillah.



(aku rase post ni bukan post utk mengenang dan bukan jugak utk bergenang airmata).




aku rase,

point aku is something like this:

sometimes, time and growth and development can’t always be tampered with. or manipulated.

maybe you can do something about the place and space.

but time and growth and development, they’re more than what a single person can control.

more than what one soul can completely override.

the cherry tree is covered in order to protect it from some elements

it wasn’t covered for the purpose of manipulating its growth

or interfere with its development.


some things you can nourish and lead

but you can’t entirely intrude and perform its (particular) role

you can’t live someone else’ life for them,

or completely make their decisions for them.


to each person is their own (role. and life. and decisions). but,

even if some things can’t be done or undone in another person’s place,

it doesn’t mean we can’t help each other find the better path out there.

every soul is separate, but it doesn’t mean that they are isolated.


point kpd point aku is that:

barangkali, setiap org itu sndiri yg akhirnya buat pilihan utk diri sndiri,

dan akhirnya, pilihan itu lah yg setiap org itu akan live with.

takdir tetap akan membawa kita ke mana kita telah ditentukan utk pergi,

tapi di bhgn2 tertentu kita akan tertolak utk membuat pilihan

dan setiap pilihan kita diketahui-Nya,

setiap akibat dari pilihan kita diketahui-Nya,

malah setiap akibat dari yg bukan pilihan kita pun sudah diketahui-Nya.

pd takdir telah tertulis setiap pilihan, setiap akibat dan setiap kesudahan dari pilihan2 kita itu, kerana Dia Maha Mengetahui.


tahun hadapan pd masa yg sama seperti ini,

di mlm yg terakhir utk tahun itu nnti,

jgk sudah pun diketahui-Nya.

utk setiap ketika, jika pilihan kita merosakkan diri kita,

disebalik segala yg berlaku, wlaupun keburukan yg buruk itu disebabkn oleh diri kita sndiri, namun setiap yg baik tetap merupakn kurnia-Nya, dan ketentuan-Nya atas kita tetap adalah yg terbaik utk kita pada masa itu, pada wktu sesuatu itu terjadi.

sbb pengetahuan kita yg singkat tak mungkin sama dgn pengetahuan Dia yg Maha luas dan Maha Mengetahui,

dan keputusan dan pilihan seorg manusia tak mungkin sebaik apa yg telah diputuskan oleh-Nya utk kita.


point kpd point kpd point aku is that:

wlaupun kita yg akan buat pilihan, tapi tetap takdir Allah yg menentukan.

dan takdir tak boleh dipersalahkan atas aper2 pilihan yg kita pilih.

utk setiap pilihan, ada akibat yg akan tiba, walau kita tak menginginkannya sekalipun.


so in the end i think, what we choose is not only what we have to live with, but also what we have to be responsible for.


and i guess, that is all.


and with that i conclude my last post of this entire year,



(goodbye 2011).


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