work it out.

Published April 16, 2012 by crystalights

so today was my first day at work.

 

it was okay.

except that i wrote the wrong thing on my library form (because org kt situ tak bgtau clearly tht dier nk “faculty” name, dier keep saying “department” instead pdahal dlm faculty ada diffrnt2 department/bhgn and courses), and then i made a correction which was ALSO wrong pastu by the time i got the right name of my faculty to put into my library rgistration, librarian tu tgok muke aku mcm nk telan and then dier ckp: “itu tak apa”.

(dier mcm tak nak btulkn je. shud i be worried?).

tapi takpela, at least i can already pinjam buku2 on my first day. and i managed to get the only (few?) cop(y/ies) of those important books that i need for my upcoming lessons. mgkin hikmahnye is that aku dpt pinjam buku awal & cepat wlaupun register library dlm keadaan tak properly confirm some things here & there. (klau nak tnggu all of those things siap confirm kmungkinan besar lambatla aku pinjam buku dan tak jamin 100% pun dpt pinjam semua buku yg aku nak pinjam). 

well, at least they got my name right.

 

and then when i did my finger-printing jari kiri aku tak dpt dicapture oleh mesin tu, means i can only use my jari kanan, means if anything happens to my jari or fingerprinting anytime in the future, i have to naik H.R every single time it fails its detection. org tu tak ckp pun i only have that one set of try, aku tak sangka after buat skali msin tak dpt capture then trus dier tak nak setting yg baru utk aku just because dier ckp nnti kene bwat semula yg jari kanan & setting yg baru (semule). so instead of ada data jari kiri dan kanan, my nmbr only have data jari kanan sahaja for my finger-printing.

(aku pun tak tahu why dier refuse, does it cost money, or does it cause an extensive amount of work + time, or does it require a whole new finger or something?)

tapi takpela, let’s jst hope my finger doesn’t fail me. means i’m not supposed to be late to work sbb klau finger-printing bermasalah nnti take time nak daftar attendance nanti rekod disiplin tak cantik. mgkin itulah hikmahnya.

 

walaupun aku ada this strange + complicated compulsion with things in my daily life where i feel unsettled when small2 things go wrong tapi aku rase i have to pull myself tgthr and just do the best i can in the best way that i can. key wordnyer adalah: “that i can”.

so i can’t turn back time, kan?

“that i can” refers to things that can actually be done.

wlaupun ada cacat skit2 (according to my painful standards of how work life should be), tapi just bertolak ansur je la (dgn diri sndiri & circumstances) at least for now. jgn smpai bnda kcik2 pun bleh drive me crazy & drive the people around me crazy, just stop being so crazy, okay?

maybe esok atau luse boleh tanye librarian klau dh dpt btulkan my faculty name & msukkan my new work email.

pasal jari tu, redha je la. mudah2an jari kanan tak bermasalah di detect setiap hari, Amiin.

and klau takut ada masalah detection, cube dtg lebih2 lg awal lg supaye klau ada masalah pun takdela ambik mase waktu bekerja sgt.

 

at least i can use my finger.

at least i can use the library now.

at least i have my access card, and pple frm the IT department pun dh dtg set-up kn internet + pc + work email for me.

at least i have been given my own workspace + table + drawers +desktop.

at least i have a job to go to.

 

kdg2 bile kiter fikir yg messy2 all day kiter mcm tak ingat pulak nikmat yg baik2 yg Allah dh bagi. (“kiter” tu refer to aku la. mcm tak biase pulak).

 

ya Allah, aku rase berdosa sbb asyik look at the bad parts je. ntah2 takdela bad pun, maybe it’s just me and my twisted pre-conceived notions of things and circumstances.

 

astaghfirullahalazim.

 

bukankah hari ini, bertambah2nya sbb2 utk aku lebih bersyukur?

 

alhamdulillah untuk semuanya,

termasuklah untuk pilihan dan kesempatan seperti ini.

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