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All posts for the month May, 2012

living in the “now”. at least for a little while.

Published May 27, 2012 by crystalights

i think it’s almost a month and a half that i’ve been working.

work is okay, not all perfect and dandy, but it’s okay.

i am thankful, alhamdulillah.

 

i was just thinking about my plans for the future.

so

 

hi dad,

gimme 2 years.

i’ll (try to) figure something out so that i can fulfill that expectation in my own terms.

 

it doesn’t feel right to gamble my life for the sake of a career

but it doesn’t feel right to fulfill my own dreams while completely disregarding filial piety

 

aku faham siape yg berhak ke atas aku.

 

so.

 

maybe aftr 1 and a half years i’ll start searching.

 

anyway,

on a lighter note,

 

aku rase walau ke mane pun aku pergi

i just have to try to be someone yg berusaha

yg bermanfaat kpd diri dan org lain.

walau kt mane pun aku berada,

i have to try and do what i can.

bukan separuh masak,

bukan separuh hati.

 

i have to try and make the effort

sbb aku org yg dh take a lot from this earth from the favours of the One who created me.

aku org yg slalu meminta dan berharap dan byk yg telah tertunai untukku oleh Dia yg Maha Memberi.

Dia izinkan aku tamat pengajian selengkapnya dlm tempoh sesingkatnya dan izinkan aku kembali ke tanah air secepatnya.

Dia izinkan aku mula bekerja secepatnya dengan pekerjaan yg sebaik2nya yg aku inginkan.

Dia buka jln tarbiyyah utk aku saat aku jauh dari org2 yg selama ini bersama aku.

the least that i can do is to not just become a solely self-centred person for the rest of my life wherever i am, whatever my position.

 

insyaAllah,

i want to try.

insyaAllah, ada jalan utk kita.

 

ya Allah

help me undrstand,

and help him understand,

that this is the best that could ever happen to me at a time like this.

limpahkan kesejahteraan, kesihatan yg baik dan petunjuk yg sempurna utk kami semua yg meniti hidup di sini,

Amiin.

 

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some things.

Published May 4, 2012 by crystalights

i think

i’m in love with my job (apart from a few “annoyances”), things have been okay.

alhamdulillah.

 

i find myself thinking about work even during my day off (like weekends).

 

it’s just that some people did kinda get on my nerves a bit,

but i think the rest is okay.

 

semalam ayah call, sruh aku balik nxt week.

sbb ada panggilan exam next weekend, insyaAllah.

 

that was what got me thinkng about the work i’m doing now (well that and also some other things that happened yesterday and today).

 

and this is off-topic but i kinda wanna say this here;

 

i think that there is nothing worthwhile to look forward to when having presented with a marriage proposal live on national tv IF the proposal is as corny, clichéd and bland and with an outline/plot that is soo over-used and almost predictable it’s not worth an umpteenth repeat anymore.

 

if everything is done and re-done then why even bother?

 

the perfect proposal would be the one where the pride and dignity of the bride-to-be is protected from widespread exploitation.

where she is not a mere object of a free show.

 

some things are too delicate to be tactlessly highlighted

 

some things mean so much more when they are nurtured and protected.