travelling

All posts tagged travelling

sky

Published December 7, 2011 by crystalights

watching the sun set from the highest floor of the highest skydeck in the Southern Hemisphere 

is nothing short of amazing.

it’s the 88th floor of the Eureka Skydeck (Tower)

 

eventually the sun sets.

and only then did the city lights become more visible.

the transition was beautifully slow

little by little

the redness splashed in rainbow streaks across the horizon.

little by little

i find myself bearing the things that i thought was almost unbearable;

little by little

i realized that it doesn’t matter what i feel

i got up there anyway

i saw the sun go down and disappear beneath the line

it does not wait

for anyone to be with it

it just sets

the way that it is meant to set (in).

 

staring at the sun from the highest floor

everything seems so much clearer.

looking at the airplanes gently cruising the sky

and the sun slowly sinking so smoothly

i know that the world moves (on) as time passes (by)

it does not stop unless predestined.

 

perhaps

you and i are not who we used to be

the sun and the earth is not how it used to be

the view from the top is not how it used to be

perhaps 

we are among those used to how it used to be

perhaps

you only notice the citylights when the sun disappeared.

but of course,

the citylights can never be the sun.

a thousand generic flicker can never outworth the value of one star.

 

they may be similar but always, always not the same

always trying to fill in the inadequacy

always, but not enough.

 

i think

no matter how beautiful the view is it will never be perfect without the sun in it.

 

the sun doesn’t have to wait for me,

let me wait for the sun.

 

i can’t be the way you want me to be just like i can’t sleep with my eyes open

we see things when they’re open

when they’re closed we take more breather

when they’re closed we sleep off the entire world

because beautiful things doesn’t stop your eyes from closing

 

when the time comes

 

open or closed, aren’t they still your eyes?

 

 

 

 

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tomorrow’s price and payment.

Published February 12, 2011 by crystalights

so the people that i was supposed to stay with (but suddenly cancelled) contacted their son+daughter-in-law

and their daughter-in-law contacted my parents’ friends

and then these friends informed my parents

and then i’m not sure what exactly is happening or is about to happen but

i’m supposed to contact them when i get there.

and i guess right now, for now, that’s the best that i can get to the possibility of not being homeless (although i can never be too sure about that).

i met those friends of my parents (the one who helped contact that family), and i can say that these friends are very nice and warm. they have this small, close-knit family and are rather affectionate with one another.

i looked at them and i thought: oh, so that is how it’s like to have a very affectionate family.

they don’t have everything, but half-an-hour at their home you kinda get this feeling of how they feel for each other and i guess that was something.

it was, a little heart-moving.

i thought it was kinda difficult for a person to show the ability to love, but what the heck, some people are very capable AND sincere. no questions asked, no prerequisite conditions, just honesty and a heart.

yes, some people do give a damn about each other. it’s just that i’m being exposed to the selfish ones too often that i become one myself (sometimes).

anyway, after the meet-up with these friends of my parents i felt like i can’t really entirely lay my verdict on the people who cancelled. maybe they have reasons (which i don’t understand) for cancelling my stay with them on such short notice. at least they managed to contact someone else from their family who contacted my parents’ friends who contacted my parents.

it’s a long story, but i don’t want to leave anything out.

i’m just a little unsure. confused. forlorn. about a lot of things.

and my thoughts are a mess and so writing them down is a process of sorting them out.

maybe i’m just dizzy because i felt something back then when i was snapped at in my own home but refusing to hide and cry because it’s not the right time to be defeated?

maybe i was starting to wish for things that i can’t have right now like a family/person who could understand?

i don’t know anymore.

.

i could try to be where they want me to be but at what price?

isn’t there always something to lose?

the last party.

Published February 1, 2011 by crystalights

it’s our last celebration together before everything ends

so for me, it has to be perfect.

i wanted invitation cards

and party favours

and a lot of colourful party acessories

(i would have loved the balloons and tinsels and crepe papers and confetti, but apparently that’s not gonna happen, for now).

my little sister kinda thinks i’m crazy for wanting such full-blown party things

but

i don’t know why, i want this one to be different.

i wanted the satisfaction of doing it right

because i’m scared

that when the party’s over and the magic wears off i’d probably be stuck with reality without a memorable happy moment

for once i wanted to feel rightfully happy.

.

so, okay. we’re not having balloons and glitters

but we could try and have evrything else done right.

so i spent the day cleaning and tidying up

and yesterday we worked on the invitation

 (after some discussions with my little sister) i came up with something that looks like this, but my design was lighter without the black background.

it is actually a Birthday and Farewell Party.

(my little sister’s birthday is coming soon and my leaving is happening soon too).

we figured it’d be okay to do it in one shot.

we were preparing the party favours (i specifically told my little sister how i wanted it to be, and for who).

and finally the goody bags are done. (if you look closely, you can see the pink panther stickers i put on the wrappers).

i liked doing these things.

it makes me feel like: there is a purpose, and i’m fulfilling it.

i want people to come, eat, and then bring back something thinking: that was nice.

.

we just have to cook, and get the cake tomorrow.

and then i think everything’s done.

.

and yes

yes

i’m scared.

as the days draw closer i’m getting more and more terrified

.

i have around 19 days left before the end begins

.

i don’t like flying

i take time to get accustomed to new surroundings

and i’m not really emotionally stable when i’m on my own.

.

so this is more of an early birthday party for my little sister than a farewell party for me

because i’m not exactly celebrating a farewell

i’m just letting people be informed of my departure, that’s all.

.

EDIT:

here comes the cake

happy birthday & farewell

 

people. things. yesterdays. and tomorrows.

Published December 19, 2010 by crystalights

 

you know,

a lot of times we women can’t always get away with wearing certain things.

certain dangerous things.

 

unless you’re barbie.

but anyway.

because i have respect for myself i would feel somewhat naked if i wear things that barely function as clothes.

we wear clothes for our good health too. to keep our temperatures right.

they’re not merely tools of fashion.

so

when you wear such dangerous things

you don’t really know if you’re well protected and secured enough from all those threats the entire universe contains.

you know, the mental, psychological, social, physical threat that comes with such garments.

as for me, when it comes to clothing and womenswear i would like to believe that it’s better to be safe than sorry.

and i also would like to believe that i, like the rest of the human population, deserve as much respect from people to not be shown parts of the human body which i do not wish to see.

they tend to attack my eyes.

.

so please.

cut down on the peek-a-boo thingamajig.

no one wants to unintentionally guess your size and all.

and no one wants to know how stretchable your outfits are.

.

anyway,

i thought it doesn’t matter where i’m going and who i’m seeing.

i am 23 years old after all.

i finished highschool a long time ago. 

i mean. we all have our moments being-stupid-with-friends and little immature occasions where things don’t go well between you and your hot-blood friends.

since i am supposedly going somewhere soon, i just thought that there are a few of my old friends i need to see, just for old times’ sake.

whatever happened in the past is in my memory but i don’t think it’s something i want to dig up and bitch about at a time like this.

at a time like this, i don’t wanna go through piece by piece and pick out the ones that i don’t like, or don’t feel good with.

i want to just see them for a bit.

at least enough for me to know that i didn’t hurt anyone and no one’s hurting me (anymore) now.

that i’m not hurt by anyone anymore.

so i don’t really understand why she’s reacting like me going to see them as something very unworthy of my time.

this is probably the only last bits of time i have left before leaving, of course i should go and see them.

of course i should spend my time on something that i have given my word to.

i agreed when one of them said that they wanted to see me.

so i should go. spend what little time i have left with them.

before i really leave for that specific period of time later on.

.

i know i’m selfish most of the time, but now i also know that i have to do everything i can while i’m still here so that there’ll be no regrets.

and if words fail me, at least my actions could show what my heart wants to say, somehow.

.

so i don’t understand why she doesn’t understand.

this isn’t a whim.

it is a need.

i needed to know that i can start with a clean slate later when i finally go where i’m supposed to be.

.

travelog. travelogue.

Published May 25, 2010 by crystalights

 

a few days ago, i was here

i went there for some stuff at the site’s convention centre 

(the closest shot to the event’s halls)

but i wandered around 

and found something else

“with all my heart,

find me and i’ll be there for you”

captioned at the bottom.

so, of course.

my fangirlish heart started screaming inside~

one of my favourite bookstores

organized a theme of one of my favourite vocal groups

on glass display quoting one of my favourite lines

from one of my favourite songs.

so i hurried inside

and discovered that they’re actually doing a special feature promoting the group for the month of may

and there’s a whole shelf of books and magazines that the boys had appeared on before

including group releases and solos (even JJ’s an-an was there).

the cutest part is probably the manga about them and their legal battle

although i don’t understand the japanese writings, the drawings efficiently tells the story (drawn pictures of 3 out of 5 members and a statement on paper with signatures = legal battle).

owh, and there’s even a drawing of that tattoo on the chest (haha).

and yes.

everything’s in japanese.

(they’re all in the japanese section. of kinokuniya).

.

and then my lil’ sister came and lectured me about being a mindless bimbo fangirl

so i kinda pointed her a magazine showing another group that she sorta like

so she took her time to see (while i wandered around the bookstore).

.

and when we got out we sat in a sportswear shop.

and she asked me about the near future (which i honestly don’t quite know)

i like to make myself believe

the planet earth runs slowly

it’s hard to say

that i’d rather stay awake when i’m asleep

’cause nothing is ever as it seems

that song was playing on in the store

and so i sang along.

.

we went and stopped at the cupcakes booth

and they look so amazing (with sexy names)

(this is “dark secret”).

there’s “the morning after”, something “affair” and some other sexy names for a cupcake.

.

we bought “vanilla dream” and another sexy cupcake (i forgot the name).

 ♦

and they taste amazing too, pretty frostings and all~

the cute little cupcakes come in white boxes and paperbags

so we walked some more and found something else

but that would be

another story to be told another time~ (haha)

(sorry but it’s almost dawn, i only have a few hours left).

.

you know

when you travel all the way

there’s always one thing or another that you’ll eventually find~

.

so with that, i’ll pen-off for now.

»(KLCC, 2010)«