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prom queen

Published July 7, 2010 by crystalights

 

yesterday, we made brownies.

it’s a little too moist and fudgy though.

but extremely sweet.

and now no one’s really eating it besides me and my little brother

my sweet tooth kills

.

i thought i only have an interview on monday

but today someone else called for another interview.

whatever that means. they’re just interviews. i’ll go to the one on monday. and then another on tuesday.

it doesn’t mean anything.

it’s like saying you’re invited to the prom. (but everyone in school’s invited to the prom, so. whatever).

owh. and schools in malaysia don’t have proms so stop turning every single thing into prom reincarnation(!)

what “princess of the night“? “lady of the gala“?

it’s tacky. and overrated.

schools in this country are supposed to be boring and prom-less.

they’re supposed to make you work hard for papers and exams and toughen up and grow up and then go to work and wear shiny leather shoes and walk the talk. and perform!

no need for your dancing shoes. you just need your rows of distinctions and accolades and then you can rule the world, one prom-less night at a time.

haha.

*turns off witch mode*

.

the truth is that i don’t want nice girls like my friend live thinking that all education/career-driven individuals are douches. especially if they’re young and accomplished.

but it’s so hard to prove otherwise sometimes at the current state that we’re living in.

because lots of nice girls should care more than just looking nice on a prom or prom-less night.

you can be nice and driven and accomplished- all at the same time.

you can be more than just a prom queen.

it’s your heart and mind that makes you different. on the surface, aren’t we all the same?

.

 

feel it

Published June 13, 2010 by crystalights

 

do you know what it’s like

to feel so, so much

all at the same time

when your heart feels like it’s about to burst

and all kinds of different emotions just fills you to the brim

.

run away now

don’t stay now

don’t let it get to you

.

it’s crazy terrifying huge massively unreal but so believable

so damn believable

it’s overwhelming

it’s a private emotion

that fills you tonight

and a silence falls between us

as the shadows steal the light

.

how far could i possibly be

from being crazy

unbelievable

Published June 11, 2010 by crystalights

 

i was trying to access the student portal to get a few things to print for next week, as well as trying to complete a few letters and after 24 hours of wasting my time, just look at what i got in return:

The page cannot be displayed

The request cannot be processed at this time. The amount of traffic exceeds the Web site’s configured capacity.


Please try the following:

  • Click the Refresh button, or try again later.
  • If this error persists, contact the Web site administrator to inform them that this error continues to occur for this URL address.

HTTP Error 500.13 – Server error: Web server is too busy.
Internet Information Services (IIS)


 

.

LMAO

.

seriously.

for such a thing to occur, WTH has the entire system been dumped with?

.

i don’t have time for this

the undeniable server failure

again

for the umpteenth time

what kind of service is this

no wonder people (like me) don’t intend to come back to stay

.

whatever

screw that.

random scribbles on a tuesday.

Published May 25, 2010 by crystalights

 

it’s late afternoon/early evening~

normally at this time of the day we’ll be sitting around together figuring out what to eat

..and then deciding about a few hours later.

so

we’ll probably have something like this

noodles + seafood/seasnacks + veges with spicy tom yam gravy brewing in a hot pot and served with two separate sauces

(yum!)

but now that i’m far out

we don’t have this dish here, huhu.

.

suddenly teringat sbb nmpak udang goreng tadi, huhu.

(tapi tak bleh makan lg. blom time).

.

okay.

malam ni berusaha utk tido awal (esok try bangun pagi. fighting!)

.

sementare tu, layan budak ni tgok2 mjlh pengantin;

her: “wei, suami dier tinggi giler pas tu isteri dier pendek

          giler!” (sambil gelak ala2 halilintar)

me: “taklah. agaknye s’tanjak dier yang buat dier nampak tinggi

          kot.”

her: “tak wei, isteri dier ni memang gnome!” (sambil gelak

          xtra giler)

***********

her: “wei, malu gile wei amek gamba mcm ni pas tu hantar kat

          majalah!”

me: “aper yg malunyer? ni lagi malu” (sambil tnjuk gmbar

          pengantin naik basikal)

***********

her: “omg! wei tgok ape dier pakai ni-“

***********

and then she finally finishes the whole magazine and says:

“nampaknye nanti bile aku nak kahwin nanti aku kene design baju kahwin aku sendiri la”.

.

suddenly i remembered my friend’s wedding gift preparation

(the bodyshop spa set with a matching towel)

according to traditional malay culture, the groom will give their wedding gifts for the bride on trays (in odd numbers) to the bride on the wedding day, and the bride will respond by sending their prepared set of wedding gifts for the groom (also in odd numbers, but more than the number that the groom gave).

so if the groom gives 7 trays of gifts, the bride must give 9 or 11 or 13 and so on (because the numbers must be an odd number).

.

interesting?

well, the interesting part would be the type of gifts that the bride and the groom puts for each other.

the more traditional ones would be quality fabrics to make the “baju kurung”

or pretty cakes and artsy biscuits

but the more modern ones are electronical gadgets like the i-phone or a PDA

.

weddings are rather elaborate

and cultures enrich them, don’t you think? 

travelog. travelogue.

Published May 25, 2010 by crystalights

 

a few days ago, i was here

i went there for some stuff at the site’s convention centre 

(the closest shot to the event’s halls)

but i wandered around 

and found something else

“with all my heart,

find me and i’ll be there for you”

captioned at the bottom.

so, of course.

my fangirlish heart started screaming inside~

one of my favourite bookstores

organized a theme of one of my favourite vocal groups

on glass display quoting one of my favourite lines

from one of my favourite songs.

so i hurried inside

and discovered that they’re actually doing a special feature promoting the group for the month of may

and there’s a whole shelf of books and magazines that the boys had appeared on before

including group releases and solos (even JJ’s an-an was there).

the cutest part is probably the manga about them and their legal battle

although i don’t understand the japanese writings, the drawings efficiently tells the story (drawn pictures of 3 out of 5 members and a statement on paper with signatures = legal battle).

owh, and there’s even a drawing of that tattoo on the chest (haha).

and yes.

everything’s in japanese.

(they’re all in the japanese section. of kinokuniya).

.

and then my lil’ sister came and lectured me about being a mindless bimbo fangirl

so i kinda pointed her a magazine showing another group that she sorta like

so she took her time to see (while i wandered around the bookstore).

.

and when we got out we sat in a sportswear shop.

and she asked me about the near future (which i honestly don’t quite know)

i like to make myself believe

the planet earth runs slowly

it’s hard to say

that i’d rather stay awake when i’m asleep

’cause nothing is ever as it seems

that song was playing on in the store

and so i sang along.

.

we went and stopped at the cupcakes booth

and they look so amazing (with sexy names)

(this is “dark secret”).

there’s “the morning after”, something “affair” and some other sexy names for a cupcake.

.

we bought “vanilla dream” and another sexy cupcake (i forgot the name).

 ♦

and they taste amazing too, pretty frostings and all~

the cute little cupcakes come in white boxes and paperbags

so we walked some more and found something else

but that would be

another story to be told another time~ (haha)

(sorry but it’s almost dawn, i only have a few hours left).

.

you know

when you travel all the way

there’s always one thing or another that you’ll eventually find~

.

so with that, i’ll pen-off for now.

»(KLCC, 2010)«

 

it’s only words

Published May 17, 2010 by crystalights

 

“menentang penindasan dan stigma sosial” tu ape?

kalau kau betul2 nak ambik kisah, lebih baik kau kisah psl bnda lain yg lagi penting mcm perintah dan larangan-Nya. buat ape nak kisah tentang stigma sosial yg remeh itu?

siape kita disisi manusia tu lebih penting ke dari siape kita disisi tuhan?

kalau dah ditetapkan ia salah, maka tetaplah salah.

this is no longer a matter of social stigma or dogmatism or morality.

there is another side to it which goes right back to your beliefs: divine law.

it is not for humans to decide because we don’t set that up, it has already been set and sent for us human beings.

your idea of anti-conservatism and artistic rebellion is really not the ultimate answer against everything that you deemed as “penindasan”.

itula masalahnye bile seni dan social principles diletakkan di tempat yg lebih tinggi daripada divine law.

you take your art too seriously.

like you are not writing but carving words onto glass.

cube bertenang skit. anggap je kata-kata kau tu hanya 1 medium utk merungkai rasa. and then dah. cukup. titik.

bukan sesuatu yg begitu majestic dan magical utk diangkat sebagai pedoman.

cukup.

cukup2 lah tu.

ape bezanya org yg tahu semua yg kau tahu dan org yg tahu semua yg kau tak tahu?

apa yg kau tahu yg org lain tak tahu tu lebih tinggi ke kedudukannya dari ape yg org lain tahu yg kau tak tahu?

see?

it’s not something that you can take out and weigh on a scale.

so isn’t it better to go back to the rightful path?

in terms of what we know or don’t know, aren’t we all generally the same? we only know certain parts of certain things, we don’t know everything.

hence life teaches us, so that we still have room to learn.

.

jadi

sorry. aku rase mcm tak jadi nk find out that story- sbb story kau byk yg predictable. similar. rebellious tapi cliched. anti-dogmatic tapi anti-climatic.

sgt2 common dan tak rare atau unique lagi.

.

tak memenuhi pencarian aku.

.

so long and goodnight

.